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The Ant and the Grasshopper revised?

+4 votes
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Oct 15 in Fun & Humor ☻ by Ladyhorse (342 points)
edited Oct 18 by Ladyhorse

                                                    The Ant and the Grasshopper

Original Version

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he’s a fool and laughs, dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

Current American version
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he’s a fool and laughs, dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

ABC, CBS and NBC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can it be that, in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Then a representative of the NAGB (The National Association of Green Bugs) shows up on Nightline and charges the ant with green bias, and makes the case that the grasshopper is the victim of 30 million years of greenism.

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when he sings “It’s Not Easy Being Green”.
                                                                TO BE CONT'D. BELOW...

3 Answers

Marianne Oct 15

Well, that is quite a surprising version of the story - Kermit - an inspiring source of chuckles - appearing with the grasshopper to blame the ant, and involving The National Association of Green Bugs, NAGB, or a "Nagging Ambiguity Generating Bubbles", which burst without emitting the slightest "BANG" ...

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World indeed ...

:O:D


Ladyhorse Marianne Oct 15

I just had my TS on here looking at how my post showed up on the Home page as opposed to the way it showed up on the personal messages. He is not familiar with the site and is indeed baffled...and agreed with Virginia. He suggested questioning the owner/developer but I am unable to get in touch with Dan so I guess it has to stay this way...I'm gonna play around a little more to see if I can do a different type of copy & paste.

Marianne Marianne Oct 15

Yes, Ladyhorse; we are working with older systems, and there might be problems on-line with more sophisticated software and apps. On my side, I have tinkered around, but had to correct posts, answers or comments "manually", after their entry.

Dan will certainly find a solution. But I suppose that right now, it is about 1.40 a.m. in his place, and he must be fast asleep.

By the way, the disturbing signs and computer orders have disappeared; Dan seems to have arranged that.


By the way, take a look at T(h)ink's memorable rhymes and have a good laugh.

Ladyhorse Marianne Oct 15

Okay, thanks. I just sent two replies to Tink but they didn't post below so he must be at work?? 

Marianne Marianne Oct 16

You're welcome, Ladyhorse; I see your answer "LOL" addressing T(h)ink.

Or did you try it over a PM?

Ladyhorse Marianne Oct 16

I was going back & forth so much, I don't know where I posted it. They weren't just the LOL's. When I said "he" I was referring to Dan because he was shown as being on here last evening.

My hubs was reading your recipe post earlier...he laughed.


Marianne Marianne Oct 16

Lol, Ladyhorse - good to hear that you and your hubs are enjoying a good laugh; I found this hilarious joke lately on-line, and I couldn't resist.

As to your posts, they seem to have gone lost by accident, and that happens to me too - and sometimes, they are delayed. I forgot to suggest to refresh the page in such cases to see if your post is there.

:):D

TheOtherTink Oct 15

And Bill and Hillary showed their unsurpassed support for the Green cause by accepting many, many donations of green, large and small (but especially the former), to the Clinton Foundation. You can't ask for more devotion than that. 

image

Two crooks, known as Hilly and Bill,

Most certainly knew the cash drill.

They glommed lots of green

For their sleazy machine,

From Norway, to Rus', to Brazil.

:angel::D:D:D

LOL!!


Ladyhorse Oct 17

...CONT'D.  

Bill and Hillary Clinton make a special guest appearance on the CBS Evening News to tell a concerned Dan Rather that they will do everything they can for the grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those who benefited  unfairly during the Reagan summers.

Richard Gephardt exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his “fair share”.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the “Economic Equity and Anti-Greenism Act” retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs. Having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, the ant’s home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal hearing officers that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare moms who can only hear cases on Thursday’s between 1:30 and 3 PM.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of of the ant’s food while the government house he’s in, which just happens to be the ant’s old house, crumbles around him since he doesn’t know how to maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow. On the TV, which the grasshopper bought by selling most of the ant’s food, they are showing Bill Clinton standing before a wildly applauding group of Democrats announcing that a new era of “fairness” has dawned.

...author unknown


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