+3 votes
in Fun & Humor ☻ by (18.5k points)
Supposedly, these are advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country.

For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy.

Great Dames for sale.

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.

For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.

Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required.

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.

Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.

Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.

Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.

We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.

Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.

For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.

Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.


Link: http://www.ahajokes.com

4 Answers


Well...I MIGHT be interested in that widower with young children...and I could prolly handle some light housekeeping but being well past the age of menopause now, it might take something of a miracle to contribute to the growth of his family...

Marianne Virginia

Lol, Virginia - :D:D:D ...

Marianne TheOtherTink

Lol, T(h)ink - :D:D:D ...


Another good one! :D :D This sign should be down the street from me as some people are getting real tired of a particular neighbor.


Marianne Rooster

Lol, Rooster, I couldn't help chuckling and remembering a certain difference between British and American English regarding the definition and the etymology of "ass" (British citizens refers mostly to "asinus", resp. "Equus africanus asinus" and American citizens rather to Old English "aers" or "ears" (Scottish "ers"):




TheOtherTink Hitman

@ Hitman,  um... I never heard it called a jumbo juicer before... :O :) :D

Marianne Hitman

Lol, Hitman - good to see you again, and: an excellent pick! I am hesitating between the "Hoover" advertisement and the "Cyclone Jumbo Juicer" for a "Giant Thirst" - showing - err(mm) :ermm: - raising lubricious ideas if checking the neighbourhood - oops - cough cough (turning red like a tomato :blush: - oh, how shocking!)


:O) ...... :dizzy::devil::angel: :D:D:D

And some more fails: